Self-Care Activities I Now Have Time For

 

white and purple flower plant on brown wooden surface
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

It is quite the luxury to feel un-rushed now. Before the shelter-in-place order, I was incredibly busy with my new job during the weekdays and attending social activities on the weekends like baby and bridal showers, brunch dates, and obligated family gatherings, which pretty much occupies most weekends for a woman in her early 30s. Now, with all the time in the world due to the shelter-in-place order and working remotely from home, I can finally do things I wouldn’t normally do if we all weren’t on house arrest (or at least it feels like one).

This new temporary norm was definitely an abrupt lifestyle adjustment at first, but after four weeks in, some of these activities could permanently fit into both my current and post-quarantine schedule. Best of all, they take thirty minutes or less and can also positively contribute to your overall health and well-being. Nothing is sweeter than a double dose of goodness.

1. Take an outdoor walk with a household member.

Instead of normally commuting back home after work, I now replace the time with a 30-minute evening walk with my sister, who I currently live with. After 5pm, we take a walk around our hilly neighborhood and pretty much talk about anything and everything. The latest updates on COVID-19 and the virus’s impact on our work and overall economy have certainly been our main discussion topic, but it is nice to be able to talk to each other about our feelings and thoughts about current issues, un-judged and unfiltered. At the end of our walk, both of us feel relieved getting stuff off our chest with each other and we get an easy, short workout while doing so. Plus, we get to see cute, neighborhood dogs from a distance during our walk.

We have never done this before the quarantine. But with this shelter-in-place order, we have adjusted our lifestyle around it and managed to find a way to have a deep conversation, in between binge-watching Netflix shows and baking. Actually, this is more like triple dose of goodness because this lets me spend more time with a tolerable family member, unload my unrestricted opinions on this person, and meet my 5,000 steps goal on my Google Fit app every day, all at once.

2. Perform a cooking challenge during lunch hour on weekdays.

For the past five years, I have been mostly eating microwavable food and leftovers for lunch at work. Don’t get me wrong, I like convenience and I still do, but the ability to cook a fresh meal at home beats a mildly warm leftover fried rice at the office any day. Lunch is now a plethora of hearty choices using whatever is available in the fridge and pantry, along with a handy kitchen gadget and clean cookware.

There are lots of healthy recipes that take thirty minutes or less to prepare, and I use the remaining time left to watch an episode of Kim’s Convenience. Lately, I have been doing a personal challenge of figuring out recipes and methods to cook a rainbow plate of delicious food, which consists of vegetables, healthy carbs, and lean meats, using the least amount of time and cookware possible. So far, I have really enjoyed making tasty, colorful lunches for the past several weeks and found myself being more productive and less sleepy on the latter half of the work day. Win-win.

3. Treat myself to a spa and relaxation session.

Before the state-wide lockdown, whenever I did a face mask, I would also be doing something else simultaneously, in order to save time. Now that there is no rush to go somewhere or meet someone, I have some extra time to do a face mask while relaxing my mind and body. It is still multi-tasking in a way, but in a good way. I can lay on my bed with either a cool face mask or mud mask and listen to soothing music without much interruption – outside or mentally. My thoughts are not consumed by the next task, but just being in the moment and actually meditate a little bit.

This has probably been the best treat I have given myself while staying at home. It is free, takes only half an hour, and, at the end of it, my face is brighter and my mind is clearer. For somebody who rarely goes to a spa or let alone even pay for one, this is the next best thing to the real thing. I also never would have thought of doing this in relaxation mode, without doing something productive at the same time. Having time for yourself and performing a self-care routine was considered a luxury to me and I now do both simultaneously on a regular basis. I can even do this on a weekday and not need to wait until the weekend to do this.

Self-care has usually been something that I needed to squeeze somewhere in my busy life and kind of doing it half-heartedly when I did find time to do it. Recently, it has gradually cemented into my not-so-busy schedule and paved itself as a necessary activity for benefiting my overall mental health, improving my mood, body, and mind. Self-care is not selfish, because if I strive to live with a healthier mind and body, it benefits everyone else around me and the work I do. I can have better relationships with people, improve work productivity, and be more creative with a calmer mind. The important thing is to start now, when you now have the time to do it.

Minimal Ways to Maximize Ideas

design-photo

Ideas can sprout anywhere. It does not always come in the perfect environment, the best timing, or an ideal location. If anything, they come at the oddest and most inconvenient moments. Knowing this, there are ways to help foster ideas and spark creativity by sticking to using basic tools in a not-so-perfect setting. Being minimalistic and even messy can spark big ideas. As a landscape designer by profession and a general creator in my free time, I have found ways to maximize creativity by using minimalistic tactics. This is not always pretty or organized, but, truthfully, the root of creative ideas never are anyways. They are usually the rawest and roughest form of bigger ideas, which is how ideas are naturally generated.

1. Use basic tools to sketch ideas.

A clean, new sheet of scratch paper makes me nervous and could actually hinder me from developing new ideas. I agonize too much over ruining the new sheet and beat myself over about whether or not the first line is worth drawing on. I also get too stressed over the possibility that if the idea sucks, then the new sheet is wasted. So instead, I became more flexible to drawing my ideas on a random paper or something accessible at the time, like the back of a scratch printed paper, on a lined journal page, or on a paper napkin. I became accustomed to sketching on things not exactly designed for ideas, but they are still economical, resourceful, and practical. Most ideas are produced by chance too and not at the dedicated times when I sit and stare over a blank piece of paper, so it is okay to grab whatever piece of paper is handy.

A basic working pen or pencil can be more appropriate to use for ideas than a fancier one. As long as the pencil or pen produces enough ink or marking without too much effort, then it remains an effective tool in drafting ideas. I prefer to use a black ink pen because this forces me to commit to the sketch without the ability to erase or retreat from my initial thoughts. Inked sketches also help keep a permanent track record of the ideas that were thought out, so I can go back and revisit earlier versions if the one I developed does not work out. I can use fancier pens or pencils later on once I finalize my ideas and want to draw a final design.

 2. Sketch small first then bigger later.

 I tend to draw in small, quick bursts rather than in larger and slower movements, especially when ideas start to flow all at once. I draw multiple sketches of a singular idea and if I do not see it working out, I move on to a completely different idea and keep repeating this cycle until I reach a satisfactory point where the idea can be truly finessed. This helps maintain idea flow and avoids wasting too much pen or paper during the brainstorming process. Drawing small can be messy and disorganized, but the whole point of the sketching exercise is to develop ideas, not constrain them. The messier the paper is, the better.

3. Maximize comfort and limit distractions when brainstorming ideas.

When deliberately trying to brainstorm ideas, it does not really matter where you are, as long as you are able to concentrate and are in a comfortable environment when doing so. The place can be at a local coffee shop, a computer desk, or even on your bed. There is no right place for generating ideas, just one where your ideas can flow freely and with little to no distractions. The space should match your comfort level and be spacious and tidied enough to draw. Your ideas can be messy, but the space around your sketch should be cleared and free of obstructions.

It also helps to turn off your computer or phone, so you will not be disturbed by an impromptu text message or swayed to procrastinate on your computer. You can listen to music or have something playing in the background if this helps you with your creative juices going. Try to concentrate for twenty minutes  – or longer if you can – and then take breaks in between by grabbing a snack or taking a walk outside. Taking breaks can be just as important when developing ideas. Sometimes when we are not actively thinking about ideas or productively procrastinating, the ideas come out in full force. Do have a paper and pen handy when they do come out of nowhere because they usually do half of the time.

How to Make Money Without a Bra or Makeup

woman in pink long sleeve shirt holding brown book
Photo by Alexavier Rylee Cimafranca on Pexels.com

I am ambitiously lazy. I have been making extra money, aside from my full-time professional job, but in my own comfort zone, barefaced and un-shaved legs, while sitting under a warm comforter on my bed in my pajamas and drinking coffee from my favorite mug. For a woman in her early 30’s, it is a freeing concept to make money whenever and wherever, without having to wear make-up, contacts, or a bra. I do not have to face anyone, look older and mature, or try to wear work attire that is not too tight or low or short to make more money. Best of all is that I do not have to be told what to do within a 9-to-5 timeframe to earn money, I can make money my way and on my terms.

To do this, I had to first take a step out of my comfort zone. In order to live comfortably, I needed to be uncomfortable first. This means deviating from the standard and taking the risk to be different. Consider this analogy: instead of hiking up on the wider, paved trail to the mountain peak of success like everyone else, I decided to take a less traveled, alternate route. It was riskier and steeper and the path may or may not have reached the mountain peak at all. I may have encountered obstacles, slip, or fall. Though, despite all the uncertainties, it was my choice to create my own path and decide where I go next. Even if the path was more difficult to climb and required a bit more work, my path could potentially lead to the peak faster.

For a long time, I was like everyone else. I was not the fastest or slowest person on the conventional path up, but I was going at a decent pace in achieving academic and professional success. I was also following the usual path of a woman in finding the “one”, getting married, and building a family one day. All of my girl friends were doing this, so I was doing the same without missing a beat. I got married last year and my wedding day was truly one of the best days of my life. While the route I was on made me feel stable and secure, I was not fulfilled. My sense of purpose was lacking, even though I did all the right things, stuck to the same path, and was careful not to disturb the status quo along the way.

Career-wise, I was chugging and grinding along like I was supposed to by having a regular job and just getting paid for doing good, honest work. Yet, I found the work unrewarding and felt trapped in a cycle of dead-end responsibilities. For the first time in thirty years, I wanted to quit a job for one that I actually wanted, not because of any life reasons or because it was the only company that gave a job offer. After achieving financial stability, I wanted to choose what I wanted to do and for the salary I wanted. This meant straying from the norm and leaving a four year job that would have made me terribly unhappy if I had stayed for another 30 years. And so, I stepped out from the conventional path and into the bushes.

At first, it was prickly, uncomfortable, and the unfamiliar terrain made me very nervous. Nobody was guiding me forward, I was on my own. I kept going though, treading carefully and purposefully. I negotiated for a higher end salary at my new job that I wanted and successfully got it. I spontaneously traveled to South Korea, a country I have never been, within three weeks of my decision to go. I did a freelance project designing a front yard residential landscape and was involved in the entire construction process, which is now built and enjoyed by the owners. While I have never done any of these before 2018, I was carving my own path.

As a petite Asian woman in her early 30’s, I seemed to be going against every traditional, cultural and social norms. Being different meant being isolated from a social circle of friends and acquaintances who were doing things by conventional standards. While a handful of my friends were having babies, I was pursuing side ventures. While they were focused on planning their baby showers or baby rooms, I was focused on my self-worth. It was a solo journey and it did feel lonely at times to be detached from conversations about family planning aspirations and expensive daycare costs. But I wanted to increase my income, to travel to places I have never been, and to create something I called my own. I did not want conventions to define me, I wanted to define myself.

It is easy to take the conventional road to success because it does lead to some guarantees and promises of financial security by relying on a steady job of 50 years, the safety net of social security and government handouts for retirement. It does not require much thinking or creativity to follow this path, as long as you work hard and long enough to reach the peak. I believe at some point in time this path may have worked in the past, but it will not make anyone a millionaire today. If anything, those who follow this path now would be unhappy, unmotivated, and even in debt. To actually get to the point of making money without a bra or any make-up on, you will need to break away from these conventions and start making money by doing things you like, not what you have to do. In the long run, you will make more money by doing things you are interested in and, once you do, you can make even more money your way.

Investing in myself was probably the most profitable decision I have made in my life. It allowed me to make more money than I ever thought and now I have the ability to make even more by investing. It has been rewarding to do things on my own. It is a new high that I have discovered and the more I do this, the more of this I want. Plus, my side ventures did not feel like work at all because I enjoyed doing them. I also did not need to work ten times harder to get ten times the results. It was true that I worked longer and I needed more brainpower to push through, but I did not work harder. I did what I normally do when doing something new for the first time, which included many hours of researching and reading. I also talked to friends for some guidance and advice who were long-time veterans of these situations, like negotiating for a higher salary. If you are open to continuous learning and gaining new skills, then do not be afraid to ask for help from others who have succeeded in doing so.

Now that you have a steady income flowing and presumably have paid off all debts, the fun part begins: it is time to make more money by investing. In the next Part II post, I will explain techniques on how to earn compound interest, how to conservatively make money from the stock market, and how to maximize your 401(k). Truthfully, if you choose to invest in yourself, all the other parts of your life could be very rewarding – professionally, socially, and financially. All it takes is a first step off the conventional trail.